Positive Affirmations Are a Scam (Do This Instead)

Why Affirmations Are A Joke

Every day you scroll past someone telling you to “just say it until you believe it.”

Say you’re rich.

Say you’re successful.

Say you’re powerful.

They say if you say it enough, you’ll feel it. And if you feel it, you’ll become it.

But there’s a reason that doesn’t work.

Because deep down, your brain knows when you’re lying.

That little voice in your head hears the affirmations, and calls BS.

You can’t fake your way into self-belief.

And trying to lie to yourself with cute phrases in the mirror just reminds you of what you’re not.

That’s why the people shouting affirmations the loudest usually have the weakest confidence behind the scenes.

They don’t believe it.

They’re using words to cover up a lack of action.

That’s what affirmations are: a costume.

They look like confidence on the outside, but there’s nothing real underneath.

I’m not saying mindset isn’t important. I’m saying your mindset has to be backed by reality.

And the reality is this, confidence isn’t spoken into existence.

It’s earned.

And if you want to start building it for real, you have to start giving yourself a reason to believe in yourself.

Here’s how.

Confidence Comes From Evidence, Not Fake Positivity

If you don’t feel confident right now, that might not be a problem.

It might actually mean your brain is functioning correctly.

Because confidence is supposed to come from proof.

If you’ve never fixed a car, should you feel confident being under the hood with a wrench?

No.

If you’ve never launched a business, should you feel confident charging people money?

Absolutely not.

Feeling unsure in situations where you don’t have experience isn’t a mindset issue, it’s common sense.

What you’re missing isn’t belief.

What you’re missing is reps.

Confidence is just self-trust built through action.

So instead of trying to force the feeling with words, build the proof with execution.

Here’s how I did it.

When I was 16, I read something in Muscle Media from Bill Phillips, the founder of EAS Sports Nutrition.

This dude had made millions, sold his company for over $300 million, and was one of the earliest creators of modern sports supplements.

In one of his columns, he said something simple but powerful:

Write down five things you’re going to do today, and do them.

That’s it.

The things didn’t have to be big.

• “Work out.”

• “Eat clean.”

• “Call your mom.”

• “Read for 15 minutes.”

• “Take care of one thing you’ve been putting off.”

But the rule was: whatever you write, you finish.

That’s how I started stacking wins.

And something started to shift.

Not because I was doing anything crazy.

But because I was finally keeping the promises I made to myself.

That’s where real confidence comes from.

Keeping your own word.

It’s not loud. It’s not flashy.

But when you do it over and over again, your brain starts to trust you.

You stop feeling like a fraud because you have receipts.

You know what you say gets done. You start to feel solid inside. You stop trying to hype yourself up, because you don’t need the hype.

You’ve got the proof.

That’s where belief begins.

Write Your “List of Great” and Act Like Him Now

Once you start stacking daily wins and keeping your own promises, it’s time to take it a level deeper.

Because building confidence isn’t just about consistency.

It’s about identity.

You need to decide exactly who you’re trying to become.

That’s where the “List of Great” comes in.

This is a tool I’ve used for years to shape the version of me that’s now running multiple eight-figure businesses.

Here’s how it works:

You take out a sheet of paper and write down everything about the future version of you, the guy who’s already achieved the goals you say you want.

• What time does he wake up?

• How does he train?

• What’s his posture like?

• What kind of problems does he handle without breaking?

• How does he respond when sh*t goes sideways?

You write it all down.

Not the goals. The behaviors. The habits. The mindset.

Then every time you act in alignment with that list, you start becoming that guy in real life.

That’s where confidence explodes.

Because now your brain isn’t trying to trick itself with empty affirmations.

It’s getting real-time feedback that says, “Yeah. We’re him now.”

And the more you do it, the more locked in you feel.

Not because of hype.

But because your identity is changing.

Not on a vision board, but in your nervous system.

Stop Being Negative, It's Destroying Your Brain

I’m not asking you to be blindly positive.

I’m asking you to stop being negative.

That alone can change your life.

There’s something in your brain called the reticular activating system.

It controls what you notice.

When you start talking constantly about how tired you are, how broke you are, how unfair life is… your brain starts filtering your entire reality through that lens.

You literally start seeing more of what you complain about.

Because that’s what you told your brain to look for.

This isn’t manifestation. It’s basic neuroscience.

The same way you buy a car and suddenly see that car everywhere, it’s not that the world changed.

You just started noticing it.

Same thing with opportunity. Same thing with problems.

If all you talk about is what’s wrong, that’s all you’ll be able to see.

Even if solutions are right in front of you.

That’s why I never say, “I’m broke.”

I say, “I need to make more money.”

I don’t say, “I’m tired.”

I say, “I need to get more energy.”

It’s not some corny life coach trick.

It’s precision.

Because your words are instructions for what your brain should filter for.

Start talking about what you want, not what you lack.

That switch alone will open doors you didn’t even know were in the room.

The BMM Takeaway

Confidence isn’t a feeling. It’s a skill.

And like any other skill, it’s built through action.

Not through mantras. Not through vibes. Not through shouting in the mirror.

When you prove to yourself that you follow through, you build self-trust.

When you act like the version of you who wins, you start becoming him in real time.

And when you stop reinforcing negativity, your brain starts giving you better data to work with.

You don’t need fake positivity. You need receipts.